China, Vietnam · 212 Days · 13 Moments · November 2017

My daily journal

16 June 2018

William is having 中考 today and tomorrow. We are staying with Jim.

14 June 2018

Jim and I have been wearing husband & wife rings since 29th May. I’m so happy. We decided to get the marriage certificate next Tuesday morning. Feeling very calm, not as exited as looking forward to the ring. I have loved him as my husband already. The marriage certificate is just paperwork.

11 June 2018

William will have the entrance exam for high school this weekend. In fact it will be after tomorrow. He still doesn’t study hard. I don’t know what should plan if he fails in the exam. Fingers crossed!

22 April 2018

Marc has been to kindergarten since 8th April. More than 2 weeks now. Yesterday was the first day he didn’t cry when I dropped him off. When he cried, he asked “why I haven’t graduated from kindergarten?” “When will I graduate from kindergarten?””why I haven’t grown up?”...

24 February 2018

Our last day in Vietnam of this trip. It is a great trip. We enjoyed a lot. Marc also has learned a lot. I believe everything will get better and better. Can’t sleep tonight. Will have a long day fight back shanghai. Then go to work. Work. Well. Feeling stressed about the coming busy work. I’m still not sure whether to try my best to get promoted. The salary will be good, but the sacrifice of family time will be too much at the mean time.

21 February 2018

Marc was sick since the night before last night. He got Diarrhea and vomit, and fever. Took him to see a doctor yesterday. Today he is getting better. This morning we rode bikes and carried him on my bike to see countryside. Had good time this morning. After nap, this afternoon I took Marc to the beach. This boy was a weirdo. He didn’t want to get his feet on sands. We fought. I had to carry him on the beach. Quite embarrassed. So Jim was upset by my spoiling him. He was very upset and distant. At dinner time, we talked a bit. Probably we should think twice about whether to move together. Anyway, I am upset too. I love him with my life and will never have any interest in any other man. If one day he decides to give up on me because I have a young child, I will feel very hurt. But what can I do if that day comes? I will have to accept and live on it. I hope that day will never come. He is the only man I love so much and want to spend my life with.

17 February 2018

Anyway, it’s a big challenge for Jim to spend the 10 days holiday with us. Marc and I are with him 24/7 and go anywhere with him. This is the most intense for him. In fact it’s the biggest challenge for him. When we move into one family, my kids will have their own room and need go to schools, I will have an ayi to take care of Marc, jim and I will be busy at work. And Marc will grow bigger and bigger. The relationship with me and my kids will never be as intense as this thrip. If he can handle this trip, I should not worry anymore about our moving together.
Second day in Hoi An. Most part of the day was fine. Went to the same coffee shop, jim and I read book and phone, Marc played with his LEGO and watched cartoon. Had crappy lunch. Marc didn’t eat anything. I was worried of him, so I carried him a lot and even woke him up to feed him milk when took nap shortly after we came back to the hotel. After he was waken up, Marc spent long time to fall asleep again. So Jim and I didn’t have chance to do our nap exercise “routine”. Around 4pm, I woke up Marc. He was whining to be carried when we went out. Jim was annoyed of my tolerance with Marc. We walked across the river to the quiet island. Had some beers and fruits. Marc was good for a couple of hours. Then we went to dinner. Not proper food for Marc, but I did try to make him eat something. I guess Jim was upset with us again. After dinner, had a bit trouble with ATM.

15 December 2017

Jim got the job! He will be a principal! I’m so happy and excited for him! These a few weeks we were working and talking about this job intensely. The process to wait for the result was like a torture. The night before he was too frustrated to cry. He got the job. He got the job! I’m so proud of him! I’m also feeling good for myself! I am the one supporting him and encouraging him all the time. And I will always be the one supporting and encouraging him whenever how challenging this job will be. I’m so proud of him! He is amazing! From the first sight I saw him, I have fallen in love with him. He is so intelligent, classic and elegant. He is sooooo good!!!!

10 December 2017

Had a terrible dream and cried much. Dreamed Jim was having affair with yanbaizhi. So I broke up with him. I pretended to calmly leave his place, but almost killed myself once I walked out of the door. We are perfect together with strong connections and deep love towards each other. I trust him very much. Don’t know why I had this terrible dream. Maybe because yanbaizhi has told me too much about all men get crazy about her? Maybe deep down I’m so feared of losing Jim because everything is so incredibly beautiful?

6 December 2017

Don’t know why I lost my long draft on journi. Anyway, busy and occupied these days. Overwhelmed by Jim’s VP interview. Interview will be held tomorrow. I even have changed my password into jim1winvp...hope he will get the vp job!!! This early morning I went to the hospital to see a doctor. I evidently found there was a bump in my left breast and was badly worried it might be cancer. The doctor said I am ok. I’m so relaxed. But Jim didn’t respond to my messages for one day. Maybe he had muted my wechat as before. Maybe he was too busy and occupied to remember me. I do feel upset. But tomorrow will be the big day for him. Tonight he should be positive and relaxed. I should not show him my upset. Anyway, it’s him. I love this man, so I should accept everything about him.

17 November 2017

I thought i am the strongest one in our team and would not have altitude sickness. But it turned out I was badly influenced by the 3400+ meters altitude. Bad headache. Dizzy. Sick. No sleep all night. Felt horribly painful. To make my trip worse, Marc had a fever. So I asked wuGuoYuan and DingYi, my team leaders, for early coming back home, in stead of going to Xi’an for weekends. Last night YanBaiZhi took Marc to hospital after having attended William’s parents meeting in school for me. William went to the hospital with Marc to keep him calm. I’m so glad I have such a good boy as william. Here i am. In chengdu airport. Missing my boys at home.

16 November 2017

Just boarded. Heading to LaSa. Quite excited for the coming snow Mountain View.